I just realized that my online diary has been left neglected for almost a month.

Time travels so fast that it leaves us behind sometimes. With a snap of the finger, a month has past, and we now embrace the New Year, with a new hectic semester lying ahead of me.

This holiday break till date is probably the best I ever had so far in the 23 years of my life since I had exited the pathway of my mother’s womb. I have finally started my quest to see and explore the world, a dream I had since I started watching discovery channel, and seeing the model of the globe displaying behind the glass panels in shops.

Somehow, I felt that I had always been trapped in a dimension so small I am almost myopic, and cannot vision what lies beyond this cage. Like the frog in the well, my “boundary less” sky is limited to the circumference of the opening of my hole. Now, I have finally leapt pass this bricked wall and realized the varsity of the magnificent Earth. My destination has extended beyond China and Taiwan or Malaysia where my ancestors lived their lives and returned to ashes to the United Kingdom and North America.

The world out here is so resplendent and life has more than what it takes. There are so many great things out there, but today, we are almost so narrow minded, we grip and grouse over all the slightest issues, or even obstacles in our lives. What have we become? And have we forgotten how fortunate we are today to exist in an era considered so relatively peaceful and contented, disregarding all the global warming problems and squabbles between countries?

I once thought that my life was over. But then, who determines what the end is? Maybe I am preaching a little here, but the bible states that death is only the beginning when we ascend to heaven provided that we are certainly going upwards, not downwards. So, what is the true definition of an end or a finish?

I blamed myself and maybe the world for the falls I had in my life, and without any shame, I admit to the numerous falls that I had been through, but through each wound I get on my knees and elbows, I learnt a lesson. Some lessons may come with a huge price, some paltry, but then, they all came with a message.

I learnt mine.

Maybe from traveling I have learnt to see the world with a broader heart. Perhaps the vast land covered in snow, all white, has touched my weary soul. I cry when I see how resplendent nature is.

The snowflakes, which melt almost immediately on my hands. The sun, which never felt warm in the winter. The storm, which made me frozen and rooted to the ground. The frozen pond, which I started skating on. The sheep, which camouflaged themselves with the snow. The horses, which galloped across the vast land.

This is beauty.

I thank my folks for being so supportive and loving. And I am not saying this because I know my entire family reads my writings, but because from my heart, I could feel their love for me. so much so, that I learnt to treasure my life. Together with Sealion, and my friends, I found hope in my life.

How could I have been so imbecile when I was young to once believe so strongly that I was not loved by anyone? Thankfully, I have awakened to the reality.

I thank god, for how my life has transformed.

I like this simple life now.

Out of the mess, out of the “colorful” life.

☺

My Travel Plans
091209 - 160909
Vancouver – Cananda
Victoria – Canada
Grouse Mountain – Canada

231209 – 281209
Alor Star, Kedah – Malaysia
Genting - Malaysia

030110 – 100110
Glasgow – Scotland
Manchester – United Kingdom
London – United Kindom

110110
hell begins – NTU